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The unpardonable sin - Part 3



........continued from last week.

 I actually agreed to the conditions and I was happy but also sad because I couldn't still explain what I had done wrong to deserve this brutality.

 Families celebrate Christmas together with the exchange of gifts and more, ours was not left out. My dad bought so many gifts for my siblings but as the conditions given to me, I was excluded and I dared not ask. Guests came and left with my siblings introduced but I was exempted. It was a bitter sweet experience but then more happy because my siblings were always there for me despite all. They showered me with love.

Fatima (a class mate of mine and a good friend) came to pay me a visit to know if everything was alright. She had not seen me in school since resumption, I told her a summary of what was happening at home. She felt for me, it all sounded unbelievable in her ears, with a warm and encouraging hug, she wanted to leave after a few hours. After much pressure of requesting to see her off, I caved in knowing the consequence of breaking the terms. I saw her off quite a distance gisting and discussing other matters, it did feel good to be free like this. Quickly I increased my steps while returning home, just a few blocks to our house, my worst fear came to pass! I froze when I heard my father’s horn at my back. He said “Go inside, kneel down and wait for me." I knew I was finished!

 He asked “Where are you coming from?" Without allowing me to explain he beat the hell out of me using the metal head of his belt. I screamed daddy please, I held the belt out of annoyance, he used his leg and hit me on my chest and that was all I remembered. For how long I was gone I couldn't say but I regained consciousness feeling body pains all over my body, it seemed like a dream but when I opened my eyes, I was lying on my younger sister's leg while she cried uncontrollably. Mum came back and rushed me to the hospital, when I got back home, I went to my room in tears, I took one of the insecticides in the house with with the intent poisoning myself. I thought it would have been better to die than to be alive! I was about drinking it when my elder sister walked in, held me and screamed! My mum and other sisters rushed to the scene, immediately my dad walked in, he started beating me but this time around my sisters stood up and yelled at him. For the first time, my dad was resisted from laying his hands on me.

I continued living like an outcast especially before my dad until the day I will never forget in my life. It was the day a family friend who  we regarded as an uncle, he came visiting from Suleja in Niger state, my dad told him all the negative things about me and asked him to deal with me. It was around 11am when everyone had gone out, my uncle called me to his room, he asked me what happened, I told him my own part of the story, he felt pity for me and told me not to worry. Then he asked me to go get some drinks for him outside (he gave me some money) when I returned with the drink, my uncle asked me to wait for him to get something. He got to the door and banged it, immediately I felt uncomfortable, I wanted to leave but he dragged me and we both began to struggle against each other. Being a  stronger and bigger man, he overpowered and raped me! My cruel uncle broke a promise I made. I cried! "So much pain for a teenager, what is my sin?" I queried.

 Who will believe me? Who would I have run to? I kept crying holding unto my tummy with the fear of dying soon. Mum returned about 4:30pm to prepare dinner, she asked me why I was stained with blood all over, I lied to her that I was on my period. My dad came back later in the day and my uncle told him all sort about me, I was still trying to defend myself when daddy bounced on me but mum came to the rescue. While the conversation went on, there was a knock at the door, Two police officers, my friend (Ifeanyichukwu) and her mum. They asked of me, immediately my heart skipped, I thought (not now).

One of the officers explained what happened saying: "Our attention was drawn to two young men who were engaged in a fight, after much questioning in resolving their differences amicably, it led to their arrest. The second policeman continued the narration saying a certain girl called Ifeanyichukwu was pregnant and Obi was responsible for it, but he didn’t have money to terminate it, therefore he told his friend. Mike came up with an idea of duping his uncle to get the money on the condition Obi would have to pay interest on it in return. They stole Mike’s uncle laptop, phone and gold jewelries and demanded for ransom, he paid it without knowing those behind the act. Obi gave Ifeanyichukwu the money for the abortion which she did. So one morning (That was the same morning her mum came to our house and reported me to my dad) Ifeanyichukwu’s mum saw the abortion pill with her daughter, she queried her but she denied it claiming belonged to your daughter after she pleaded with her to keep it.

 As for the two young men, Obi declined to pay back as agreed, this led to a fight and Mike’s uncle had them arrested them. After this, Ifeanyichukwu's mum turned to me and said she was sorry, immediately my elder sister gave her a slap. I was quiet as tears ran down my cheeks, everyone was quiet apart from my mum who was mad at my dad. I ran into my room with so many things running through my mind:

Why me?
Why today?
Why not yesterday?
Why not earlier today?

 I just lost my virginity, if the truth had come up earlier, I would have lost the pride of a woman. All this thoughts ran through my mind as I locked the door to my room and cried. Though I was happy the truth came out, at that moment I was sad because I had lost something precious I wanted to keep for my future husband. Then I felt this hatred and bitterness for men, of course my uncle left the house in the early hours of the next day thinking I was going to react, but I found solace in my room without eating or drinking water.

 I lost appetite
I lost love in me
I lost strength
I lost my virginity
But I got my family love and trust back
 I got my confident back and life continued!

Story credit: J.O

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